sixteen

ill at ease.
still a child.
no boyfriends.
a squandered youth
i still regret.
the absence of
rebellion.
i look back,
think about myself
and feel depressed.
oh to erase the 
feelings of ineptitude.
what did i do?
read books,
write poetry.
fill page after page
of countless diaries.
i listened to sad music;
i listened to my parents
and did what they asked me.
i'll end up alone,
i would tell myself.